The Break-up Ritual
My boyfriend and I transitioned our relationship on Friday. For the last year and a half, we have adventured into a very special bond, where we released into possibility, and supported each other on our individual journeys toward our higher purpose.
Because the first 7 months of our connection was via video, we learned it’s possible to become vulnerable and go deep together, even before sharing live energetic space. With a commitment to attunement, honesty, and warmth, we’ve helped each other grow into better, stronger, and more alive versions of ourselves.
We've spent the last week here in Portland going through the extremely rough and painful process of consciously uncoupling. During this time, we designed a break up ritual that was unique to our relationship. Separately, we journaled about all of the moments that were significant to us, each leaving us with a powerful growth experience. We each chose 9 beads from the bead store to represent the 9 months since we met in person for the first time. Each of the 9 beads represents one of our special moments.
He led me on a blindfolded journey with his voice through the streets of Portland, just as he did on our first real date. I faced the question of trust again as I realized that I truly cannot see the future even through my strong belief in the power of intention. Still blindfolded, he guided me back inside and into a visual journey to meet my future self, just as I had done for him in a coaching session to explore his life purpose. On this journey, my future self shared with me her wise words looking back on our relationship. At the end of the journey, we eye-gazed and expressed to each other, through tears, the meaning of each of the beads on the anklets we had made for each other.
By wearing the anklets, we honor our time together. The first bead, symbolizing the beginning, sits next to the final bead, which symbolizes the future, as the continual cycle of transformation.
I am sharing this with you because I want you to know that endings are just as important as every other stage of the relationship. By walking with courage and vulnerability into every phase of the cycle, there is greater possibility of understanding, integration and wisdom. The ability to experience the darkest depths of heartbreak is a gift, holding the key to the real beauty of life. Thank you everyone for supporting us on our journey and believing in the power of vulnerability.